WELCOME TO CHAOS HQTHE SNACK ENDS HERE.
THE SNACK ENDS HERE.
THE CHAOS BEGINS HERE.
Buying gummies gets you protein.
Joining gets you everything else.
2,400+ in Discord•18k on Broadcast•Weekly drops•No newsletters. Ever.
// WHY JOIN
TWO ROOMS. PICK BOTH.
🎮
DISCORD
YOUR LOCKER ROOM.
- Vote on new flavors
- Talk fitness & gear
- Weekly challenges
- Early drops
- Exclusive discounts
- Behind-the-scenes
- Founder Q&A
- Giveaways
- Beta test products
- Meet other gym rats
IG BROADCAST
DAILY CHAOS.
Not another newsletter.
- Memes (mostly The Nominator)
- Product leaks
- Workouts you'll actually do
- Behind the scenes
- Polls & flavor votes
- Stupid ideas (some ship)
- Launch countdowns
- Pure unfiltered chaos
// THIS IS WHERE RETENTION LIVES
COMMUNITY CHALLENGES.
Compete. Earn badges. Win merch and lifetime supplies. Or just lurk — we don't care.
🏋️ Gym Goblin🏌️ Fairway Fueler⛵ Dock Destroyer🎓 Study Survivor🌄 Trail Beast
// LIVE LEADERBOARD
- 1🏋️@deadlift_dave4,820
- 2🌱@grassgoblin4,610
- 3🏌️@fairway.fuel4,290
- 4⛵@dock.destroyer3,980
- 5🎓@studysurvivor3,720
// COMMUNITY GALLERY
REAL PEOPLE. REAL CHAOS.
🏋️
@gymrat.kevPR + post-set NOMS
⛳
@parsaversRound 18 fuel
⛵
@saltlife.crewDock day stash
🎓
@latenight.libFinals week survival
🚴
@watt.witchCentury ride snacks
🥾
@trail.beastSummit summit
🏃
@5k.fanaticPost-race recovery
🎮
@raid.bossTournament fuel
// UPCOMING CHAOS
FLAVORS IN THE LAB.
🍓Confirmed
Strawberry Sour
June
🫐In the lab
Blue Raspberry
July
🍉Community Vote
Watermelon
August
// TOUCHGRASS AI
NEED A SNACK, A WORKOUT, OR JUST A REASON?
Talk to TouchGrass — our AI that picks your flavor, your workout, and occasionally roasts your life choices.
BRING A FRIEND.
Refer a friend, you both get $5 off + bonus chaos points. Stack 'em for free merch, free bags, and bragging rights.
Get my referral codeBECOME A CHAOS CAPTAIN.
Creators, PTs, golf coaches, gym owners, uni clubs — apply to rep NOMS, get free product, early drops, kickbacks and a Discord title that actually matters.
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